My name is David. I am a retired hospice nurse. I am also a father, a partner, a friend and a guy who likes to sit on the beach. I make The Ten Crutches Podcast.
I wrote my first short story in seventh grade about a guy whose transporter malfunctioned and turned him into a carrot. He found himself on an alien planet full of intelligent carrots. You will never read this story, so I don’t feel bad about spoiling it: he woke up at the end to find out it was all a dream.
My first big creative undertaking was in my late 20s. I made an original screenplay into an hour-long video called Insect Negotiations. I directed, did most of the camerawork, and even played the lead role myself. The movie was shot and edited on VHS tape “Really? You were alive when VHS tape was around?”
But…
When it was finished and shown on public access TV, where no one would see it, I arranged a private screening for the movie. I invited all the people who helped me make it in addition to family and friends. There were about 40-50 people in all.
The problem was this: as I observed everyone in the room watching my creation, I felt as if the deepest secrets of my psyche were up there on the screen. I didn’t realize I would feel how intimately the story exposed many dark corners of my psyche, too many personal things were on display for pretty much everyone I knew to see. It freaked me out.
Unfortunately, I didn’t have a mentor at that point in my life to help guide me. I didn’t confide in anyone; I didn’t have anyone in my life to help me persevere. I abandoned my creativity for a few decades.
Oops.
I found, in my early 40s, when I tried to get back to it, I had many great ideas for projects. (Or, at least, they seemed like great ideas to me.) I just couldn’t complete anything. My laptop was filled with short story ideas, screenplay ideas, potential novels, sketches for giant sculptures, all kinds of creative things: notes and notes and notes. But everything was a start; there were no finishes.
A turning point came while reading Elizabeth Gilbert’s Big Magic. I can’t recommend this book enough if you are a artist feeling stuck. I believe, deep down, we are all artists. I also believe, deep down, we are all stuck in one way or another.
With the new inspiration, I finished my first creative project in decades. It was a book called Spiritual Practice at the Poker Table of Life. When I look at it now, I find it awkward and poorly written; a simplistic idea executed with mediocre talent. But I finished it! . I thought of it, wrote it and published it. A wonderful thing to do. And it’s still available online for 99 cents in case you seriously have nothing better to read.
I dabbled in many different creative projects over the years, in addition to my nursing career and raising a child. For example, I wrote a science-fiction novel called Dagger Jameswood Enters the Fourth Dimension. I also used that fictional character’s voice to make a series of audio recordings, some of which I still find quite humorous. The recordings are called Dagger Jameswood Does Audio.
Since then, I keep chugging away. You can see the full list of what I have made over the years on my personal website.
But I did find myself wondering: am I forever “condemned” to be a dabbler? Will I forever flit from this project to that? Would it possible for me to focus on one thing for a sustained period of time?
And if I did choose to focus, what would I focus on?
“A podcast,” I thought. “I could make a podcast.”
I decided to take the plunge. I committed (within my own mind) to make 100 episodes of a podcast. I would base it on the book I had just finished called Ten Crutches For Walking In The Present (available for download on this website.)
So that’s what I’m doing!
After I make 100 episodes, I will pause and re-evaluate.